Social media is a brilliant thing at times and on days like Fathers Days it’s lovely that people can show appreciation and love for a loved one.
That said it can be a different story for many. It may be that a loved one has passed or you just have no or little time for them.
It happens and can make people feel sad or conflicted on a day where it’s “expected” of you to be happy
Here’s a wee thing I wrote about my dad on his anniversary a few years back and my relationship with him.
Big Joe, helluva man
That’s a picture of my dad, Big Joe, with his dad Billy.
25 years ago today he passed away.
It’s fair to say my life hasn’t gone according to any kind of plan and I suspect I have more regrets than I’d actually like to count. I do know one of the greatest I have is not realising what an incredible man he was until years after he passed.
My brother and I used to joke about how we were never James or William when we encountered anyone from the area we lived but we were always “Big Joe’s boys”. I won’t lie it was a source of quiet annoyance for me at that time.
It was only years later that I came to appreciate what gifts he had given me. I’d like to think I’ve always had a quick and ready wit and that was something with which all three of his children were blessed. He also nurtured a lifelong love of football and of Celtic in particular for which, in recent years at least, I’m grateful. The early 90s, not so much…
As I said it is a source of genuine sadness that I was largely blind to all of this while he was alive. I’ve often thought that perhaps some of the same character traits we share meant that it would have been impossible for me to appreciate any of this unil I matured. Then I’d have been able to step back and see him as a person, and have an understanding of his many qualities and a judgement-free view of his human failings. I spent too much time bumping heads, being selfish and angry to do that. This is my loss, I’m sure he knew it was me who was being a dick but was wise and polite enough not to point it out, safe in the knowledge that one day the penny would drop.
I’m typing this out as I miss him and I love him and with each passing year the memories of him grow warmer.
More importantly when I think of all his qualities the only one that I can confidently say I can do better than he ever could is type, the computer age has given me that if nothing else.
Today, on a day when Rabbie Burns is celebrated and often credited as author of the line “we’re aw Jock Tamson’s bairns” I’m just awffy proud to be able to say that I am “Big Joe’s boy”